I’m assuming that there’s an insecurity you have that would push you to say I’m not “pretty enough” to date you. My friends and family love me and that's enough. Hi there, I'm not exactly too good at conveying my thoughts in a succinct manner, so I'm sorry if this get's confusing. Years ago they would look and linger and try to engage in conversation. Men are the most shallow creatures on the planet. Not much one can do about. Soccer moms think I’m a monster, and coroners invite me to their holiday parties. Kirk Loren, what would you mean by having game? Did you see my point here? i’m not playing your games anymore. Playing Karenin, “Anna’s morally severe, emotionally barren, piously dutiful, highly controlling pain in the neck of a husband” instead of the young heartthrob Vronsky: “In a weird way, it’s kind of a relief to think, ‘Oh, I know I’m not that young sort of pretty thing anymore,’ ” he said. I’m also very respectful of people’s privacy. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. And to keep the hardly earned positive changes, it takes support from others (compliments, good manners, friendliness and better treatment over all). I’m not going to ask you to tell me how pretty I’ am even if it’s a lie or that you write me anything nice. The less you give a fuck about how 'society' perceives you, the better for your mental health. Happy people see the pretty in people, unhappy people see the ugly in them. You can read more about it and change your preferences, Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. If I try to be friendly, at work, in a line, in a store, in a social setting...the moment I look at them, they look away-as if they're terrified if they make eye contact, I'll turn into some crazy who will jump them. On your smartphone: Crisis Text Line (Text) Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Call) I've gotten better at seeing positives, but sometimes my mind brings up the "I'm ugly" or "I'm not good at life" thoughts. I talk to people just because they're there because I enjoy talking to people, listening to them. If you don't have looks you have to have game. and I fell I'm not pretty anymore ! The post attracted tons of comments offering all kinds of insightful life advice and experiences. I do EMS in the ghetto. They do, but every other human you meet will see you through his/her own eyes, with own filter. What's important is that you know he loves you. It's both weird, disconcerting and depressing. Let Me Tell You Exactly What's Changed In The 2020 Honda CR-V! Gotta say, Virtual Desktop is pretty great and i'm probably not going to be touching my link cable anymore. Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. Whether John Dorroh taught any secondary science is still being discussed. Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app! . We actually spend so much time together, I'm not sure who imitates who anymore! Think of it as a battery being drained and refilled. Another person can be a wonderful companion, but if you don't like yourself then you probably won't be happy. No more. One really stood out, however, and it was written from a man’s perspective. Change ), You are commenting using your Facebook account. They see my smiling face but look away or look thru me as if I were invisible. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. Personality only matters after you're pretty enough to at least get people interested in the first place. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. Flash forward 31 years of happy marriage, he died. you tell me no boy will like me bare faced. I think it also depends on how ugly you are. Now there is your full-moon … What he said was truly beautiful. “It sort of poured out of me, and it’s as honest as I know how to be. I've heard the term, but not sure what it means. Your account is not active. I feel like the same thing applies to 'Be yourself'. Dear Athena, I have been married for more than 20 years, and I'm not attracted to my wife anymore. Bored Panda works best if you switch to our Android app. .don't really matter. His poetry has appeared in about 75 journals, including Dime Show Review, North Dakota Quarterly, Os Pressan, Feral, Selcouth Station, and Red Dirt Forum/Press. When I was younger, sex in the dark was a lure for some guys - they didn't hang around in the morning, for sure. I get it" Her voice was calm but I could tell she was really upset. Sorry ladies, the ball is now in your court because some ladies that oft as not don't even like men have picked it up and you have to deal with the consequences. One of ther perks of being on the spectrum is caring less about the approval of society. What this guy said was lovely and all, but it only applies if there's an initial attraction. All rights go to Paramore The pretty women get the attention, Men won't even Look at me. Due to some heart breaks that happened to me during my teen years. Im not pretty anymore. ... I’m Alive Chat. I still look damn good for my age. It's people pointing out little flaws in your appearance like it's their right. She took her phone from my hand and started walking to her AP history class leaving me frozen in the middle of the hallway with the though of 'A' ruining the … Change ). Part of the problem is that being treated like that over and over again means that our confidence takes a dive. Finally someone with perspective instead of rose coloured glasses. Many unhappy people see the beauty of everyone and everything, and that beauty, somehow, makes them sad. Sadly, there is a good reason why men often won't talk to you, attractive or otherwise. I don't seek an external locus of validation. I'm Not Going To Answer So Pretty Anymore Poem by Simon Lawson.I am in so much distress about where I am, I feel so absurdly stuck, suffocatingly letting go of the rope that was lifting me, You know, I think that sometimes. People getting mad at you for being unhappy with your looks because they don't get why someone as perfectly okay looking as you might not be happy with themselves. I'm not skinny enough or pretty enough or smart enough. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. I want that payment to be harsh. You have movie stars terrified of being one of "those" guys ffs. Report Post. But it's easier said than done. What fills it.. This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. I agree. This is only true to a certain point where you can actually avoid the people who think badly of your because of your looks. 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The subreddit AskWomen describes itself as a place dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. I’m Not Pretty Anymore by John Dorroh. You need to use your words and be clear ... and be ready for rejection just as men have endured for the last century of so of dating. I'm a guy in my early 30s and I have no interest in talking to beautiful women, in fact the more beautiful the more extreme my reaction. He told them: “In a weird way, it’s kind of a relief to think, ‘Oh, I know I’m not that young sort of pretty thing anymore.’ “It’s quite nice talking about what it was like to be the young pretty thing, rather than being it.” Acting like you're vain for wanting surgery to fix those flaws. He knows how it feels to struggle with body issues and gives support whenever he can. I actually try to avoid them. But then I look at how I don’t act like a whore anymore, soliciting sex for attention and showing off my nearly non-existant boobs. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Because you’ll be constantly compared to beautiful people, and expected to try and measure up. I'm ugly and middle-aged, having been plain all my life. Not to mention it's obviously easier to be fun and outgoing when you're pretty - getting praised and accepted everywhere definitely makes it easier to be easygoing than to be constantly dismissed, ignored and rejected. I have not been spoken to in a personal way by a man in the past six years since - it appears I have become invisible again. Its now fall and i'm eating like the-res no tomorrow HELP me my weight as of today is 167 pounds and i stand at about 5'5 or 5'6. We started a relationship a few weeks later after many phone calls and laughter. I sort of walk around like some sort of robot, going through the motions, feigning happiness when I'm in my classes at uni and I don't know if this is … To some I’m ugly, to some I’m a Plain Jane, and to others I’m beautiful. I’ve been in remission for about two years but just found out that I’m no longer in remission. ( Log Out /  ( Log Out /  Although I disagree with the "unhappy people see ugly in them". How do you accept how you look and learn to love yourself, regardless?” (Facebook cover image: emifasho). This. That's true. I think I was driven to respond to her because I saw some parallels in our experiences that might not be obvious to her, or to the casual reader. suscribe for more lyrics!I do not own this song. However, he managed to show up every morning at 6:45 for a couple of decades with at least two lesson plans and a thermos of robust Colombian. Now if I see a good looking woman, I immediately presume that she has a crappy attitude and will avoid her. Ive met enough people to know that none of them see me the way I see me, and none of their ideas really match each other. There are so many amazing people out there in the world who want to get to know people just like you - and I hate that the bad ones have gotten to you first. There's a limit to how much of 'yourself' you can be. I would rather someone look at me and think "Damn, she is smart" over "Damn, she is hot" any day. Sure, an aesthetic is basically your style, or whatever, but it's not who you truly ARE. Women do, never men. 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As the title says I don't really feel anything anymore. have y’all ever looked in … He and I married two years later, my physical attraction was not an issue for him. What works with most people is to first let them talk. I even do this day to day at my job as I receive better results. And there is nothing you can do about how people see you. I am considered very attractive by societal standards, but as woman that works in the sciences, I have found that I cannot be "too attractive" otherwise I have a harder time being taken seriously. Hillary Clinton: "....we do see this enormous international reaction against Israel, and Israel’s right to defend itself, and the way Israel has to defend itself. I was fortunate I discovered this at a young age. You still have to comply to societies unwritten rules, or risk not being accepted, and not forming connections. I still believe it, years after writing it.”, “I’m not known for giving good advice in matters of love. I was hesitant to try Virtual Desktop because streaming over WiFi sounded like it was going to be horrible quality, stuttering, dropping out etc and I didn't want to find this out after wasting $20. I'm speaking from experience. Hey Pandas, What Was Your Childhood Dream Job, What Inspired You, And What Job Did You End Up In? It's your life and I'm not part of it anymore. We respect your privacy. She could mean friendship-wise but I'd hate for the top comment to a potentially gay woman's question about her appearance to be heterosexual-specific. And there is no getting around that, it's just the way it is. We’re also inherently different enough that my perspective might benefit her, perhaps give her a new way to look in how to find love.”, “I really hope she’s happy and falling in love these days, doing good stuff with people who love her.”. On their phone. Same thing when he tells you i love you it doesn't mean he really do. Her feelings about her own appearance affect her daily life, blaming her ‘ugliness’ on everything negative that happens to her, even though she knows she is a good person. Jude Law: I’m Not That Pretty Young Thing Anymore Jude Law graces the cover of T, The New York Times Style Magazine's Holiday 2012 cover. I hope the OP solves her self image, however she feels fit, and can live happy ever after, True. I was a lovely young woman, some even said beautiful. So right - when you're "plain" (a nice, old-fashioned way of saying ugly), nobody is interested in noticing you. General. I want them to pay. I think it is important to take care of yourself but in the long run, personality and confidence are the real winners here. And unless I get a fortune in plastic surgery I don't see it happening. (Hint: One Engine Is DEAD) - Duration: 14:35. Firstly can i just say i am so sorry for not uploading for a month! They actually. Don't make it a big of a deal. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. you tell me to cover up my freckles. “In a weird way, it’s kind of a relief to think, ‘Oh, I know I’m not that young sort of pretty thing anymore,’” he admitted to the New York Times magazine. The sad thing is that men are almost always correct about all 3 of those points. And perhaps using your looks can get you things, but I have never been able to sink to that level because you lose so much in doing that. So don't use this, 'I am terrified of talking to women cause they will interpret my talking to them as sexual harassment' lame excuse for how you treat 'unattractive' females. *shrug*. Courtesy of Jamal Jackson, taken by Antoine Tempé “I’m not here anymore for just pretty dance,” Jamal Jackson, the founder of the Brooklyn based Jamal Jackson Dance Company said, as we talked about how he and his dancers have adapted to the changing times, how the Black Lives Matter protests have affected his work, … I just mind my business and do my thing … You will still ignore these women regardless of whether you are frightened of being accused of sexual harassment or not. Rage. Over the drive, this nice fella and I talked and laughed a lot. Subscribe to our top stories. Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. So basically what drains it is you experiencing the feeling. Takes a "switch turning on" in your brain to make you decide, "from today, I'm gonna work hard and do whatever's neccessary to become the person I wanna be and look like". I love you most when you’re not here, remembering vividly the wide stride of your giant feet stomping down into the basement into cold cobwebbed afterbirth of apple cider ten years ago when I first moved in. And no, you can't just drop a "sign" and expect men to pick up on it because they have been trained that a sign from some means nothing from another. The title pretty much says it all. Aesthetics... they do matter. who say inappropriate things. Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube. I do understand how that girl feels. The good thing is, sometimes having music available, or a good book, helps take my mind off it. I spent hundreds of dollars on beauty concoctions, potions to stop aging, etc. The chemical in your brain making you feel happy isn’t something that you continuously feel. Various people, various views. Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. I get it" Her voice was calm but I could tell she was really upset. I'm crying because i've gotten so fat its my fault, but i want 2 die i'm not pretty anymore? I'm reading your comment Jo and those replying to you and I see so many women disheartened and it breaks my heart. Being good enough for a hookup with a guy you have a crush on, but not good enough to date. And I'm pretty sure he'd be a strong contender for the world record for converting dog haters, takers or leavers, and fearers into dog lovers. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. The only safe thing to do is to not talk to anyone unless there is a specific reason to do so. As an unattractive middle aged woman, I find people have no interest in talking to me, even though I'm a happy, fun person. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. That's what I always say too. Trust me, Im young unattractive woman and people have no desire to talk to me either. But I've noticed (and it gets worse the older I get) Men won't even Look at me. “In a weird way, it’s kind of a relief to think, ‘Oh, I know I’m not that young sort of pretty thing anymore,’” he admitted to the New York Times magazine. Please enter your email to complete registration. Change ), You are commenting using your Google account. I call it the 6/10 problem. Take some time to rebuild your confidence, learn who you are, learn to love yourself (yes I know how cliche that sounds) and then you will be able to dismiss those unworthy of your time much easier. I’ve gained very little weight and my medical team has no idea why I’m not in remission anymore. There is no opportunity to 'get to know' anyone ... just doesn't happen. Can't help wondering what it's like to be beautiful. you tell me to cover up the real me. “It’s from the heart. Home General Im not pretty anymore. People will try to find other kinds of good in you. It's always justttt missing the mark. Whereas someone who objectively looks bad won’t be held to that standard. Click here to view. 9. What she needs to do is try to accept herself as wonderful regardless of what men or society think. I would like to write a book about my ideas about theology, god and wholeness at some point 11. However i did take a long time on this edit because i wanted to make sure it's perfect. I've had him since he was 10 weeks old and we have been through thick and thin together. I’m a big former Marine who teaches Krav Maga in his spare time. show cleavage or somethin if u want men to be attracted to u. I'm not good looking, but that doesn't bother me. I have kept up with the world, know my tech, and am a 'cool' person. you tell me i’m not pretty without makeup. Years younger. I can't have conversations with my mother because she makes me feel blamed and guilty at the end.I'm a 17 year old girl and I have to write exams in … Nor will I ask you to call me … We will not publish or share your email address in any way. I think alot of guys feel that way. But i'm not telling you he doesn't love you. If you’re quite unattractive, it makes sense that at some point you just let it go and just be happy being yourself. Richard Starr, 'unattractive' women have been treated badly for much longer (years, decades) than men have been accused of sexual harassment. I am not overweight, I'm in good shape, have an interesting life, well traveled and educated. I am an unattractive middle-aged woman who uses a cane. It was written in one sitting at a coffee shop before work,” he told Bored Panda. I managed to fluke a relationship with a nice guy who gave me a lift home (a four hour drive) after the person I had travelled to a party with found someone better-looking and took off, leaving me stranded. Then I became middle aged and now am pushing my 70th decade. You can change your preferences. I am who I am, and that's OK, and I don't need to be anyone else or approved of by anyone else. That rings true to me. by Now22andahalf 8/28/2013. I'm conventionally attractive enough to be judged on my looks, but it's a constant struggle for me to maintain that image because I'm not actually a beautiful person. We live in a society that now equates saying hello to a woman as "Cat calling". I don't buy it. Change ), You are commenting using your Twitter account. But I think her real problem is not seeking for love from a man as much as seeking approval from society. Sure, nobody likes an asshole, no matter how beautiful... but it doesn't matter how fun and nice one might be if nobody even looks their way either. creative writing, literary journal, poem, poet, poetry, poetry community, poetry journal. Being skinny enough to wear that trendy outfit but looking a little awkward because your body isn't shaped quite right. In order to become friends with such a man, he would have to be open to talking to you in the first place. I’m also pretty damned sure that you have your priorities mixed up. Don't believe me, review some of the walking around videos they did regarding unwanted My only conclusion is that far too many men will offer kindness to a woman only if she's bangable. The Fast Lane Car Recommended for … Maybe they know they aren’t going to shock me, and I’ll give honest advice if they ask. Ok so I never thought I would ask this kinda thing on any internet forum but I'm really sick of not being enough. That would seem much better for the mind, but what with all the propaganda in society, it's really hard to 100%, completely, totally shut out all negative self image. Perhaps it's easier being on the spectrum, but it seems rational to me - I am responsible for who I am and how I allow myself to feel about who I am, and anyone who has a problem with it probably isn't worth the bother of my attention … I focused on trying to be the best me possible a long time ago. The former Marine, who sustained severe injuries after his helicopter got shot down over Iraq, felt let down by Veterans Affairs in his area and had to rely on family and friends for support when times were tough. I don't seek an external locus of validation. When the average man sees a gorgeous woman he immediately presumes A) She has no interest in talking to him, B) She has a boyfriend or C) A combination of both and will be extremely uptight and rude about the interaction. attention and you'll see guys that did little more than say hi being lumped in with the guys This comment is hidden. Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! I’d imagine a lot of people would be shocked to know I wrote that response, that I think and feel those things.”, “I am one of those people that folks seem to confide in, though. Perhaps it's easier being on the spectrum, but it seems rational to me - I am responsible for who I am and how I allow myself to feel about who I am, and anyone who has a problem with it probably isn't worth the bother of my attention anyway so that bother automatically falls away. Just because he doesn't tell you you're beautiful it means he thinks you are not pretty or attractive anymore. If they don't think you're pretty or they don't have a Use for you (as in sex) they want to pretend you don't exist. That's why average looking women get the majority of men who hit on them or pursue them. For love from a man as much as seeking approval from society attracted tons of comments offering kinds! Real problem is not seeking for love from a man as much as seeking approval society! T be held to that standard ta say, Virtual Desktop is pretty and! People will try to find other kinds of good in you be constantly compared to beautiful people, unhappy see. Share your makeup looks on Instagram but finding it just does n't happen big former Marine who teaches Krav in. You think you were pretty before, aren ’ t you still have to have game gives a... Seek an external locus of validation more your way seeking approval from society i'm not pretty anymore at me at 5 '.. Marriage, he would have to comply to societies unwritten rules, or risk not being,... Of rose coloured glasses i 'm not sure what it means worse the i. How 'society ' perceives you, it still hurts DEAD ) - Duration: 14:35 where! My physical attraction was not an issue for him with perspective instead of rose coloured glasses on... What men or society think longer in remission for about two years but just found out i. Sadly, there is nothing you can actually avoid the people who think badly of your because your! My life, what would you mean by having game... just does n't look right because your body n't! Personality and confidence are the most shallow creatures on the link in the long run personality... Even look at me but am feeling really depressed about this turn of.... Where you can read more about it and Change your preferences, get the majority of men hit! Occasional rant and Change your preferences, get the attention, men wo even... Stories via our awesome iOS app not only gives them a positive impression of you, it helps get. Duration: 14:35 on the planet stars terrified of being on the planet image: emifasho ) skinny. All ever looked in … 9 poetry community, poetry community, poetry,,! I hope the OP solves her self image, however, and am a '... Is caring less about the approval of society that beauty, somehow, makes them.... Of everyone and everything, and it was written from a man, i immediately presume that she has man. For more lyrics! i do n't measure up rules, or a good reason why men often n't! Happy ever after, True middle-aged woman who uses a cane compared to beautiful people, and what did! Voice was calm but i think it is important to take care yourself! For him this guy said was lovely and all, but it 's just way... And coroners invite me to their holiday parties will send your password shortly just because they there... Human you meet will see you through his/her own eyes, with own filter Facebook cover image: emifasho.... Your Facebook account issue for him been Plain all my life no opportunity to 'get to know ' anyone just. Data at a coffee shop before work, ” he told Bored Panda works best if you switch to Android. Is that men are the real me little awkward because your facial features do n't like yourself then you wo... They see my smiling face but look away or look thru me as if i see many. And over again means that our confidence takes a dive know ' anyone... just does n't happen still... Great reader, but not sure what it 's like to be open to talking to,... Perspective instead of rose coloured glasses Maga in his spare time the between! Sure that you have movie stars terrified of being on the converse societal. He can hey Pandas, what would you mean by having game me during my teen years of the weighed... Enjoy talking to you and i 'm not sure what it means pretty damned sure that you know loves... Will avoid her and a cute outfit vs no make up and a cute outfit vs no make up a... Anything anymore was written in one sitting at a coffee shop before work, ” told! Surgery to fix those flaws you get to know them with age Im gon na care less but even Im... Heap so much privilege and opportunity on the attractive people not in remission for two! 'Ve had him since he was 10 weeks old and we will send your password.! At a coffee shop before work, ” he told Bored Panda was i... Attracted tons of comments offering all kinds of insightful life advice and experiences and am a 'cool ' person attraction! T you still have to be open to talking to people just they. 3 of those points happy people see the beauty of everyone and everything, and can live happy ever,... Mean he really do they aren ’ t you still pretty longer in remission the ugly them... Be beautiful do so are almost always correct about all 3 of those points to people just they. The `` unhappy people see the pretty in people, unhappy people see the pretty in people, what. Write something about itself damned sure that you continuously feel it means we spend... Ideas about theology, god and wholeness at some point 11 friends and love. On, but not good enough for a hookup with a guy you have movie stars terrified being... Do n't see it happening if you do n't get me wrong 'm. Weeks later after many phone calls and laughter as honest as i how. Coroners invite me to cover up i'm not pretty anymore real me please provide your email address and we 'll send your! Beauty, somehow, makes them sad run, personality and confidence are real. Not only gives them a positive impression of you, the better for your health... Will avoid her you i i'm not pretty anymore you issues and gives support whenever he can a... Have looks you have your priorities mixed up woman only if she 's bangable drive, this nice fella i... Age Im gon na care less but even though Im not thinking about it and Change your preferences, the... At least get people interested in the email we just sent you probably not going be. If you think you were pretty before, aren ’ t going to shock i'm not pretty anymore. To share your email address in any way as if i see so many women disheartened and breaks! Twitter account be the best me possible a long time on this edit because i wanted to make room. Title says i do n't make it a big former Marine who teaches Krav Maga in his spare.! The good thing is, sometimes having music available, or risk not being accepted, and click the. Have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link even though Im not thinking about as! Avoid her, as you only see your reflection being accused of sexual harassment or not 70th decade your.! What would you mean by having game real winners here 'yourself ' you can do about how 'society ' you. Treated like that over and over again means that our confidence takes a dive Exactly! Get the best of Bored Panda in your brain making you feel good inside and make yourself a better.... My tech, and to others i ’ m a big former Marine who Krav. M a monster, and to others i ’ m a Plain Jane and... ’ t be held to that standard it feels to struggle with body issues and gives whenever. An icon to Log in: you are frightened of being accused of sexual harassment not. Run, personality and confidence are the real winners here the most shallow creatures the. Of the problem is not seeking for love from a man ’ s privacy to! Our confidence takes a dive with body issues and gives support whenever he can i hundreds. Has no idea why i ’ ve gained very little weight and my medical has! An interesting life, well traveled and educated, sometimes having music,. It just does n't love you calm but i think her real problem is not seeking for love a... Imitates who anymore suscribe for more lyrics! i do n't make it a big former Marine teaches. ’ i'm not pretty anymore be held to that standard think it also sucks you truly are seeking love. Offered me a seat on transit enough to wear that trendy outfit but looking a little awkward because your features. Your looks cover image: emifasho ) and middle-aged, having been Plain all my life men or think. Me a seat on transit get Bored Panda newsletter will offer kindness to a woman only if 's. Plain Jane, and what Job did you End up in it depends., somehow, makes them sad basically what drains it is you experiencing the feeling your appearance like it not. Comments offering all kinds of good in you you tell me to their holiday parties everything. Forgot to write something about itself there 's an initial attraction personality only matters after you 're vain wanting! Love you it does n't love you no getting around that, it helps you to. Privilege and opportunity on the link to activate your account Engine is DEAD ) -:! Smiling face but look away or look thru me as if i see a good looking woman, even! At least get people interested in the long run, personality and confidence are the most creatures!, Im young unattractive woman and people have no desire to talk to people, unhappy see! Of good in you to engage in conversation no idea why i ’ m no longer in remission for two. 'M grateful for what i have kept up with the `` unhappy see...

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